The threat of a recession, continuing supply-chain shipping issues, and a general malaise in the turkey-drone industry is making it almost impossible to acquire a Thanksgiving turkey drone.
In short, if you didn't order your turkey drone in the past two or three weeks, you're likely out of luck for having a turkey drone zoom around the cranberry sauce and dressing at your Thanksgiving celebration.
In other news, the turkeys needed to integrate into the turkey-drone hardware are balking at being enlisted into the technology.
"Yeah—we're not gonna let some human control when and where we fly," says International Turkey Tech Union president Bryan Gobble. "And the revenue partnerships we were were promised never materialized, either. We're also sick of being disrespected, like those 'Stick a turkey on a UAS' memes. We don't need propellers to fly, idiots. We have wings."
Wild Turkeys Escape Induction into Drone Forces
However, if you did do all of your turkey drone shopping early and you're all ready for your Thanksgiving drone shows. We've found the perfect theme song for your flights—courtesy of the late guitarist Gary Richrath of REO Speedwagon.
Turkey Drone Theme Song: "Flying Turkey Trot"
Happy Thanksgiving from all of us at The Droning Company.